There's nothing like a photo-opportunity to cause the usually be-duveted, sloth-like members of the Logica team to jump out of bed on a Sunday morning with undisguised enthusiasm and rush off to the appointed meeting place with plenty of time to spare. And so it was on this murky Autumn morning, as the cameras visited Logica's Links Avenue stadium for the first time this season, that twelve fit and eager players assembled at Raynes Park station well-before the scheduled time.

Even the management team of Sidaway and Dick turned up early, though neither could play: Dick had spenced in the car on the journey down that his 'light cold' would not stop him from playing, but by the time the team had gathered, his face had readed so much it was clear this would not be the case. Thus it was that Mr Jeff Hatton obtained his opportunity to be cultured-libero for a day, and also that Mr Barry Millar undeservedly managed to reclaim his place in the team despite his unforgivable misdemeanour of the previous week. In contrast, the opposition and referee appeared somewhat camera-shy and turned up some twenty minutes late. When the game did finally start rolling, it was Woolhouse and Masting who assumed the role of directors, controlling and orchestrating the unravelling plot. Unfortunately for strikers Abbott and Spence there were no second takes. First, a crisp one- two between Abbott and Spence pierced the Magdalena defence, but whilst the Scotsman placed a firm shot towards the far post, the goalkeeper pulled off a magnificent finger-tip save. Shortly after, Spence returned the complement when he squared to Abbott who had a clear run on goal. Unfortunately, the young striker fluffed his lines as poor control allowed a defender to get back and clear. After this promising opening scene, Abbott and Spence turned out to be little more than extras as the script moved on to concentrate on Logica's defence.

Magdalena supplied the main characters for Act 2, and one of their forwards decided to cast himself in the lead-role as star and hero as he set about terrorising Logica's re-cast defence. A number of dangerous situations arose as the Magdalena forward turned Logica defenders with alarming ease, as well as using his pace to devastating effect. Inevitably, a goal had to come. And like most inevitable things, it did come, as poor defending allowed the Magdalena attacker to cut inside the box from a throw-in, and release a low cross which was converted with some ease.

Logica struggled even to provide some diversionary sub-plots. Accurate, precise passing occasionally saw them set the scene nicely, but a poor final ball or even a lack of colleagues to pass to always led to an anti- climax, with the focus switching back to the main-plot taking place in Logica's half. Woolhouse did have a little Errol Flynn cameo as he swash- buckled past two defenders before launching a ferocious cannon just over the bar. Abbott returned briefly stage-left with a diving header at the near post after a good run and cross from Boyle, but this was saved.

Just before half-time, the plot thickened as Logica's primary tormentor again wheeled inside Clarke. The Magdalena forward gathered pace and brushed past Millar before crashing a low shot past the scandal-ridden Wildsmith. At two-nil down, there now seemed no prospect of this turning into a thriller, as surely even a Hollywood ending could not rescue Logica now?

During the break, Sidaway and Dick slipped onto the casting couch. Millar and Clarke were to swap roles in an attempt to stop the Magdalena forward taking all the rave reviews. Coupled with this, Hatton was now getting to grips with his part as cultured-libero. This proved to be just the twist in the tale that Logica so desperately needed to make this a play of two acts, Brian. Despite a Magdalena onslaught at the start of the second half, Logica's defence stood firm and there were few clear-cut chances to show for the away side's early dominance. Millar and Hatton in particular made some crucial tackles, despite the frequency with which the former lost his footing on the muddy surface.

With this solid defensive base, Logica began to look more dangerous going forward as Masting and Woolhouse re-claimed their earlier held authority as directors of play. A free-kick from Woolhouse picked out Abbott but his header was turned over the bar by the Magdalena goalkeeper. Once again Woolhouse donned his pirate's costume to set out on a mazy run past a number of dazed extras, but again his shot was just too high.

An incredible couple of minutes saw Logica really threaten with a series of dangerous crosses. First Abbott got to the bye-line and sent over a veering cross: Woolhouse's desperate attempt to reach the ball at the far post nearly caused him a serious injury as he collided with the post instead. Abbott again beat a defender to get a good cross in, but nobody could get a touch on this and the ball ran to Jobbling who instantly sent back an equally inviting centre. Unfortunately Abbott was rooted to the spot as the keeper flapped dramatically in Skippy vein, but without quite reaching the ball. This sequence of pressure ended in tragedy as Spence came off worse from a fierce dual, and had to retire with a twisted knee. He was replaced by Moore, with Jobbling moving up front.

Despite the loss of a key player, Logica maintained the ascendancy and finally pulled a goal back. This time Woolhouse began a dribble in his own half, and as he progressed beat defender after defender who approached him one-by-one in the manner of baddies attacking 007 in a James Bond movie. Woolhouse shrugged them off with a Bond-like ease and continued past five ... six ... seven defenders, whilst completely ignoring his supporting cast. The last three defenders were a bit smarter and decided to ambush Woolhouse en masse. But Woolhouse was even cleverer and hit a blistering shot before he could be caught. The shot took the slightest of deflections and beat the Magdalena goalkeeper all ends up. Now there was the faintest whiff of a happy ending.

With minutes to go before the curtain came down, Abbott received the ball just inside the Magdalena half. He turned and played a ball into Boyle's feet. Despite being crumpled from behind, Boyle just managed to get the ball back to Abbott who took it past the offending crumpler. He slipped a pass to his left to the omni-present Woolhouse, who curled a perfect cross from the bye-line onto the head of Jobbling who had timed his run to perfection. An equally perfect header gave the keeper no chance and made the score 2-2.

The orchestra raised itself to a crescendo in anticipation of the perfect ending. Abbott threaded a ball to Jobbling who raced clear, and then cut back inside. Just as he had played the ball back to Abbott, he was hacked clumsily from behind. Unfortunately, the referee was quick to spot this infringement and give a free-kick. If he had played advantage, Abbott would have been clear in the box with just the keeper to beat. Abbott still had the opportunity to steal the last scene and ride off into the sunset with three points on his horse. Sadly, though, a rather tame attempt floated wide, and left the plot wide open for a money-spinning sequel.