Report by your Offensive Coordinator,

Coming off a promising win against league whipping-boys Oakway, Logica fell to superior set-piece strength against St Anslems A. Final score:- 2-3

In a match which Slems won coming from behind, the game was marked by several noteworthy events: amongst them, two goals from legendary striker Keith Sidaway, (one of which was described as 'sheer unadulterated genius', the other as just 'fabulous') and the return of 'legendary' Logica old-boy and tour-driver, Graham Read.

Unable to secure a place in the starting line-up ("remember the days when it was just an eleven-man game Ready...") Read witnessed Logica starting out the better side. Slems showed great respect for Logica as if they had been warned they could be a dangerous side. And that is the way it proved during the first phase of the game with the first twenty minutes being played predominantly in the oppositions half and only occasional 'route one' attacks aimed towards the Slems towering centre forward.

This suited both their general 'power-play' approach to the game and Logica's capability in the centre of defence with the 6' 2" Clarke and the tenancious Millar challenging for everything, the assured Hatton sweeping behind. Undoubtedly it would be difficult to recognise this steady set-up from that during the 'shaky' start to this season ....

As the game moved to the halfway point in the first half, it started to become apparent that Logica would have to work hard to match their stronger opponents. As they settled down Slems started to launch dangerous attacks down both flanks. To Logica's relief these usually resulted in little more than off-target shots or inadequate crosses.

Logica, playing their now familiar 3-5-2 formation, were caught napping when the ball was lost on halfway. Denis Malone, making his comeback after a six-month layoff, was unable to get close to the Slems winger as he streaked forward, cut inside and poked the ball past the on-rushing Wildsmith. Wildsmith did well to get a hand to the strike and in previous games the Logica boys could have been complacent enough to expect him to bring off a miracle save. Not this time though, 1-0 to Slems.

Now, fresh from believing all his own press from the previous issue of "If Selected...", Sidaway - who was captain-for-the-day in the absence of Abbott (who, incidentally, was away finalising details of Logica's 1995 campaign to Holland) - did something quite extraordinary.

Upon hearing the rallying calls from midfield to 'get back into it' Sidaway took matters into his own hands and scored for Logica with the very next but one touch of the ball - straight from the kick-off!

It must be difficult to imagine. Words are inadequate to really do the goal justice, but I'll have a go. Spence touched it to Sidaway who, having spotted the goalkeeper a fraction of a yard off his line, placed the ball squarely over his head and into the net. Truly an amazing goal ! Many readers may remember Pele trying the a similar long-range shot against Czech in the 1970 World Cup. He missed - Sidaway scored - draw your own conclusions....

Anyway, this immediately brought Logica back into the game at 1-1. It stayed that way until half-time, although the rest of the half was notable for sporadic Slems attacks and Logica counter-attacks. During the final minutes of the first half Wildsmith incurred a neck/spine injury from an innocuous save.

Focussing on the need to remain competitive, the half-time talk was interrupted by Isobel massaging Wildsmiths damaged neck/shoulders. This demonstrable show of public 'caring' quite clearly brings up sordid images of players alleged involvement with other players partners (a la allegedly Cantona and Lee Chapman's wife Leslie Ash). Surely the management should have stamped out this 'affair' at the same time as the bribery scandal was emerging, amazingly enough involving the same player!!!

Is this yet another chapter in this season of sleaze and scandal?

Forgive me. I digress. The second half of the match started with Slems exerting pressure on the Logica defence. Toman once again having an excellent game, 'pocketing' the dangerous pint-size winger, whilst Derek Moore, on for the injured/exhausted Malone carried out good work in getting forward to support the increasingly isolated forward line.

This game marked the debut of Steve Evans in midfield. The new boy made a marked impression with his good positional sense, ability to get forward and strong presence. Unremarkably, the pace of the game affected the latter stages of his debut. However, with match practice, Steve will undoubtedly be a strong candidate for the already congested midfield engine-room.

Following one of Evans' strong runs deep into Slems territory, the ball broke on the right edge of the penalty box. Sidaway pounced on the loose ball and fired a first-time unstoppable daisy-cutter hard into the kit-bag from about 20 yards. As the kit-bag was nestling inside the goalnet at the time, this piece of consumate finishing gave Logica a somewhat undeserved 2-1 lead.

This really woke Slems up. Sensing the possibility of their high league place being made a mockery of, Slems started to pile on pressure. The Logica defence to their credit stood firm allowing very little to get behind them whilst the midfield of Masting, Woolhouse and Evans began to struggle to counter the increasingly penetrative moves of the strong Slems atttack.

As the game moved through the second half, Wildsmith's injury became progressively worse and to his enduring credit (or blind stupidity!) he refused all invitations to go off, which would have thus allowed the ageing and prospective Hall-of-Fame candidate Read on to make good yet another comeback. As an aside, speculation after the game focussed on whether Wildsmith just did not want Read to make his comeback or whether it was a case of "goalkeepers are just different" ("you've got to be mad, etc, etc"). Either way Read did not manage to get on, muttering darkly at the end of the game "I'm fitter than I look y'know....."

Following a speight of Slems corners, the opposition finally made their pressure tell with a simple but telling goal. A near post corner, the ball headed on into the danger area and the on-rushing centre-half diverting the ball into the Logica net with his head: 2-2.

Immediately from the kick-off Logica were again under sustained pressure. Unable to mitigate the situation, they again succumbed to another corner set-piece soon after. The ball coming over from the Logica left and the tall, powerful, pony-tailed number 14 meeting the ball to put it into the back of the onion-bag and give Slems the go-ahead goal: 2-3.

At this point Slems relaxed somewhat, allowing Logica to come back into the game a little. A shot from Steve Evans was countered by intermittent Slems attacks. All this time, Wildsmith was able to pull off significant saves as his neck injury got progressively worse.

Generally competent but occasionally flawed refereeing finally put pay to Logica's last throw of the dice. With time running out, Woolhouse weaved (bulldozed?) his way into the opposition box only for the aforementioned tall, powerful, pony-tailed number 14 to take lumps out of Woolhouse's ankles as well as impede him from shooting.

Simply, the referee was not brave enough to give the obvious penalty decision with less than two minutes left.

And that was that. Time was played out and after a brave, sometime remarkable performance, the boys again found themselves with nothing to show in terms of points.

Summing up, there were three clear reasons which accounted for Logicas defeat :- a lack of 'battling strength', an attack which was not penetrative enough and a team performance which had no answer to Slems set-piece/ariel threat. On the positive side, the performance was not wholly bad. Out of the match came Steve Evans' debut, Malone's return, two more goals, an outstanding, heroic performance from Wildsmith and an excellent contribution from Toman.

Sadly this did not add up to sufficient on the day.